Wednesday, February 9, 2011

The First Gears

"Break up the larger story into its components, make sure you understand the exact function of each component (a story is like a machine with numerous gears: it should contain no gear that doesn't turn something), and after each component has been carefully set in place, step back and have a look at the whole. Then rewrite until the story flows as naturally as a river, each element so blending with the rest that no one, not even yourself two years from now, can locate the separate parts."
~John Gardner
 
Today is the final day of posting for the first line blogfest.  Forgive the repetition, it's part of the fun. The first line, first paragraph, first page are the first "gears" of our stories. It's worth making sure they are working properly!!


 
The First Line Blogfest
Hosted by Brenda Drake


We're supposed to keep our entries posted for a few days, especially with the number of participants.  So, for its encore performance, I present . . . 

My first line:

I crouched in my favorite box elder tree, fourth branch up from the ground and only one branch over from my sister’s piñata.
 
First Parargraph:

Pink pony piñata . . . check.
Invisibility . . . check.
Cup of worms . . . check.
I crouched in my favorite box elder tree, fourth branch up from the ground and only one branch over from my sister’s piñata. The perfect place for a ninja ambush. I just needed those girly girls to come a little bit closer.

Visit Brenda's blog to see the other participants. There are 100!!

Also: Breaking News!
 

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24 comments:

Shari said...

I want to see what happens to all those girly girls! Great job.

Candyland said...

I LOVE that quote!

Tere Kirkland said...

I needed that quote this morning, Shannon, thanks!!

Cup of worms, lol!

Diane said...

Great one and super fun! I probably would have wished that was me up in the tree with my invisibility! :O)

Melissa said...

Great first line!!

Patti said...

Loved the last line - needed those girly girls to come a little bit closer.

Susan R. Mills said...

Love the quote! So true.

Robyn Campbell said...

I'm confused. In the one you sent me the first line is; Pink pony piñata . . . check. I like that way better too. It shows where Scott's head is. ;)

No matter. Your book is SOOOOOOO good. Love you, you cool amigo, you. Hey. Karen and I have cool shades. Do you? ;) If not, you'd better run down to the dollar general after work. :)

Jen Chandler said...

This is cute! I have a feeling I'm going to love what happens to those girly girls :D

Amanda said...

Great quote!!

Elana Johnson said...

Awesome! Naughty, naughty... :)

Kayeleen Hamblin said...

This certainly sets the tone for a mischievous boy. Sounds like a fun read. Great job!

Melissa Gill said...

Oh yes, those worms are going to be good.

Tamika: said...

Loved it! Those 'girly girls' better tread lightly:)

Carla said...

I love this! and want to read the story. Nice work!

~Carla

PS. The repetition is great--somehow I've missed the other posts and am thrilled I got to read this one!

Carolyn V said...

Yay! I want more!

Kathi Oram Peterson said...

Love your John Gardner quote!

I just noticed you live in Montana. I went to Billings a couple of weeks ago. Pretty cold there! Stay warm. :)

Kittie Howard said...

Ohhhh, Shannon, what you've written sizzles! The 'girly girls' is awesome! I wanna know more.

Janet Johnson said...

Great quote! I like looking at it that way. :)

Ben Langhinrchs said...

Great! Looking forward to Crusading with you.

Old Kitty said...

And it's such fun reading it again cos it's a brilliant paragraph!! Well done you!! Take care
x

Jemi Fraser said...

Awesome quote! Love it :) Now I gotta go do it!

Kelly said...

Cup of worms! Something fun is going to happen next!

Rachael Harrie said...

Hey Shannon, love your first paragraph!

Welcome on board the Crusade, it's fantastic you're joining us :)

Hugs,

Rach

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