Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Reject Me - I Love It!

"If we are unwilling to change it is highly likely we have already reached our maximum level of achievement."
~John Fuhrman



In his book, Reject Me - I Love It!, John Fuhrman provides us with a book full of strategies to use rejection to our advantage. In chapter nine he uses the word success to provide some of those strategies:
  • Self-evaluate
  • Understand each task
  • Care
  • Concentrate
  • Expect
  • See
  • Share
Self-evaluation requires us to evaluate and compliment ourselves. Fuhrman advises us to evaluate our mistakes, determining how we can make changes for the future, and encourages us to be equally committed to rewarding ourselves with compliments when we do well.

We must understand not only the task we have created for ourselves but also why we need to make our dream happen. Focus and clarity keep us on the right road. Avoiding rejection detours us from our chosen path--our path is supposed to have rejection on it.

Care about your dreams and goals. Fuhrman reminds us that if we don't care about something, we won't pay attention to the details; the map becomes vague.

Concentration allows us learn how actions affect results, which allows us to make adjustments or new plans.
Concentration allows us to understand what we have learned so we can avoid the same mistakes. It keeps us focused on our goals and dreams, protecting us from distractions that would slow our progress and helping us overcome the fear of rejection.

Expect to succeed. Expecting something confirms its certainty in your mind.

See, feel and hear your future. Fuhrman tells us we should walk backwards toward success. Picture yourself as successful already and act accordingly.

Share how you achieve success with others. This is my favorite one. Fuhrman tells us that as we become successful we need to share what we receive, something our blogging circle does exceedingly well.
"It's not only the doing of great things, but also the sharing of how you did it that's key to your success. It makes your life happier, more fulfilling, and worthwhile. It also supports others in their quest for success--inspiring them to achieve the same rewards."
Rejection doesn't always have to be a bad thing. 
The key is in how we choose to deal with it.

28 comments:

Karen Lange said...

Sounds like a winner! Thanks for the info. Have a great day, amigo! :)

Les Edgerton said...

Good info, Shannon! I'm off to get this book.

Karen @ Scobberlotch said...

Terrific as always. Yesterday I heard that Walt Disney wasn't offered a job at the Kansas Tribune because "he lacked creativity." Can you imagine? Years later, Disney bought the newspaper. Ha! So he is a great example of using rejection to his advantage. :)

Laurel Garver said...

Great post (and wow, what a book title!). I think the point about caring is an interesting one. It can be easy to become discouraged in the face of rejection and emotionally withdraw from our dreams.

Lisa Gail Green said...

I LOVE this! YES, look at rejection as a learning experience and use it to work toward your goal. It sounds like it's meant to be more generic, but it sure fits with writing!!!

Lynn said...

Love all these points. I used to imagine I am already 'there' and work from that place. This is a reminder that is a strategy I can adopt again, for all areas of my life. Thanks for the summary!

Carolyn V said...

I love that! And it's so true. =D Thanks for sharing Shannon!

Patti said...

You learn more through your trials - right?

I love your last line.

Susanne Drazic said...

Sounds like a book to add to my TBR book list. Thanks for sharing about it.

Hilary Melton-Butcher said...

Hi Shannon .. love the success that comes from rejection .. we can learn so much along the way.

But the sharing aspect .. share as we receive .. give back .. in the A -Z .. someone said they'd not thought about the giving aspect .. only about the doing it .. it's sharing our blogs, sharing our knowledge, giving of ourselves ..

Thanks - sounds like a very good book .. cheers Hilary

Jen Daiker said...

How did you know that I needed this? Like really needed this. I've been dealing with not only rejection but the silent treatment among agents and I never know how to react. A little help would be nice.

Now if only I could get a copy right now. ;)

Heather said...

I love this post, especially that last quote. This sounds like a book I MUST have! Thank you so much for introducing us to it!

Laura Pauling said...

Rejection isn't easy but it's huge feedback once we can look at it objectively. Is our story idea not big enough? Can our writing be stronger? Does my query letter suck? Sometimes we can figure out on our own why we were rejected. Sounds like a great book.

Nicole Zoltack said...

Wow! Great post. The end quote is awesome! Rejection doesn't have to be the worst thing in the world so long as we strive to learn from it.

Myne Whitman said...

You've provided a great summary, and that highlights the last S even more. Thanks!

Old Kitty said...

What a great positive take on being rejected!! I love it - and the quote is just fab!! Take care
x

Jemi Fraser said...

Sounds like a terrific book. Life is a whole lot better when we approach things positively :)

Natalie Aguirre said...

Thanks for summarizing all the important and true points. I really like the part of sharing how you get to success and the thought that rejection doesn't have to be a bad thing. It's something to remember.

Anita said...

Some people who reject us or our work are people who teach us things. And some people are just plain mean. It helps to be able to recognize who's who, I think.

Jennie Englund said...

Rejection is no fun, but it is another chance to make ourselves and our work better.

My writing partner calls rejections "love letters." Isn't that beautiful???

Stephanie Thornton said...

This sounds like a great way to approach rejections- the silver lining to what could otherwise be a rather painful process.

Catherine Denton said...

Okay, I think I need this book!
My Blog

Susan Kaye Quinn said...

Love this! It makes me think about a speaker I heard this weekend, who talked about growth mindsets - if we're going to learn and grow, we have to believe that our efforts will actually make a difference (i.e. we haven't already reached the limits of our ability).

Thanks for sharing! :)

Juju at Tales of Whimsy.com said...

Sounds like a smart read.

Theresa Milstein said...

"Rejection doesn't always have to be a bad thing.
The key is in how we choose to deal with it."

I couldn't agree more. We need to learn from what the rejections are telling us (a boatload of form letters tells us there's a big problem), and improve.

Solvang Sherrie said...

I love this way of thinking. Thanks for posting this.

Vicki Rocho said...

Sounds like a good one, though I don't know if you'll ever catch me saying I love rejection. I can embrace the process and appreciate where it leads me...but I don't know if I can love it when it's happening.

Kelly said...

Wow! Sounds like such a wonderfully positive book!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...